Lyric

Dear Mr. Toilet

Spoken Intro

Some folks bow to money

Some folks bow to power

But me…

The most honest soul I ever met

Was in the smallest room of the house

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Verse 1

When I walk up close

He politely lifts the lid

When I walk away

He washes everything I did

Then after a while

He softly closes up again

Lord… what a gentleman

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Chorus

You can say it's sensors

Timers and machines

You can say it's wires

Circuits in between

But I swear sometimes

It feels like more than that

Mr. Toilet

You're the only honest man

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Verse 2

Smiling faces everywhere

Sweet as summer wine

Turn them inside out

There's a little snake inside

They sip another scandal

Like honey from a jar

Everybody loves

A falling star

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Chorus

You can say it's sensors

Timers and machines

You can say it's wires

Circuits in between

But I swear sometimes

It feels like more than that

Mr. Toilet

You're the only honest man

________________________________________

Verse 3

TV men shouting

"Fake news everywhere!"

Funny thing is

They're the ones who put it there

Camera lights go dark

They lean back in their chairs

Waiting for

The next set of prayers

________________________________________

Final Chorus

When I walk up close

He politely lifts the lid

When I walk away

He washes everything I did

Then after a while

He softly closes up again

Lord… what a gentleman

You can keep your kings

And your holy men

Mr. Toilet

You're the only honest friend