Lyric

“What am I even living for”

The morning I realized what I wanted most was only a dream

Despair soaked through my whole body

Universal and Disney are ruined for me

Just days ago, we were laughing in the "Magic Kingdom"

I wish Billie Eilish would just whisper "Duh" to me

It’s the dream I crave the most

It’s the dream that kills me the most

No matter how tough I act

No matter how hard I try to forget

It’s all burned into my mind and won’t let go

Your charm, sexiness, smile, voice, and that Valentina perfume

Everything drags me down to the bottom of sorrow

I bet I never cross your mind anymore

We’re not even mutuals on Apple Music or Pinterest now

Blocked from your finsta, blocked on LINE too

"Maybe on Gmail?" I still find myself hoping

Just a loyal fool, it’s so pathetic

Still haunted by the "Ghost", with my brown eyes full of "Tears"

Now, I just hate Justin Bieber and Sabrina Carpenter

It’s my first time being abandoned by "family"

You know they say “the opposite of love is indifference”

Just like you for now

It's the dream I crave the most

It's the dream that kills me the most

No matter how much I cry

How many F-bombs I drop

It’s burned into my mind and won’t let go

Your grace, kindness, no one even comes close

That Western vibe, so social, effortlessly elite

Will I ever find an Asian girl who can outshine you?

In a temporary paradise, I said to you

"You know what? I had the worst nightmare

I thought about ending it all, so many many times

You left me behind. It was such a long, painful nightmare…”

The iPhone alarm goes off

My pillow is soaked