Lyric

I used to draw escape routes in a rented room

Like one clean line could cut me loose

Pinned my future on a nameless skyline

Borrowed those lights and pretended they were mine

“Never give up and you’ll make it someday”

Easy little sermon when your rent gets paid

I spent every ounce just surviving the now

Had nothing left to make tomorrow count

Talk about dreams, they’ll laugh in your face

Talk about facts, and the air gets erased

Couldn’t fit hope, couldn’t fit defeat

So I stayed undefined on a dead end street

Was I never serious? Or never free to try?

Still looking for an answer While another year walks by

Call it a dream, Say I threw it away

Don’t say I couldn’t reach it Say I never made the play

Blame where I came from, Maybe I’ll sleep tonight

But there’s still someone in me Crying where I keep him out of sight

My friends got titles, keys and plans

Clean little futures in their open hands

Smiling through a screen like life came through

I look away before I’m happy for you

“They just didn’t work hard” yeah, nice excuse

Tell me where to start when there’s nothing to use

No cash, no time, no nerve, no ground

But somehow every failure had my name stamped down

No one tied me up, no one locked the gate

So I’m not even allowed to call it fate

Couldn’t prove the chain, couldn’t show the bruise

So I learned to look calm while I quietly lose

I speak like I’m fine, keep the sentences clean

Turn panic into rhythm so it won’t make a scene

Every bar says what my mouth never will

Funny how the beat is the only place I’m real

Was I never gifted? Or never given room?

Too scared to test the answer, So the possibility sleeps in its tomb

Call it a dream, Say I was young and naïve

Don’t say I wasn’t wounded Say I got good at hiding the bleed

“Still plenty of time” That’s the cruelest line

You show me the starting gun When I can’t afford the shoes to run

What if I had space enough to stop? What if one mistake didn’t cost the lot?

What if the road let me turn around Without everybody watching me drown?

Would I have chased the very same thing? Would I have chosen some different skin?

Never had time to find what was true They wanted an answer before I even knew

Call it a dream, Call it a lie from the start

Erase the fool who believed in it Before you erase what broke his heart

Blame the world outside, Then blame the face in the glass

Neither one gives this emptiness A name that’s built to last

Was I never serious? Or couldn’t stay that way?

I keep the question breathing While I bury another day

I don’t need tomorrow. I don’t need my old life back

I just wanted one decision That didn’t feel pre-tracked

Just once in my life, Before the credits began

I wanted to believe I had chosen who I am