Lyric

The first time I saw you

Honestly, you freaked me out

You were huge with long legs

And way too damn fast

My wife screamed

Yeah, I couldn't blame her

You ran across the wall

Disappeared behind the shelf

I thought about catching you

But then I looked you up

Turns out you eat roaches

Well, that changes things

I don't wanna touch you

Don't want you near me

But if you work around my house

Fine, do your thing

A few days later

There you were again

My wife screamed

You ran for cover

I watched you disappear and thought

Go get 'em, Sergeant

Eat as many as you can

Here comes the Sergeant

There goes my wife again

You're just minding your own business

Even if you're creepy as hell

But at least you're useful

Killing roaches in my house

Here comes the Sergeant

There goes my wife again

Somehow I started waiting

For you to come around

Do your job tonight

Go get those roaches

You do your thing

We'll get along just fine

You always showed up

Out of nowhere

In the corner of the room

Behind the curtains

By the bathroom door

Every time, my wife would scream

"It's back! Do something!"

Little by little

That bothered me more than you did

Every time I saw you

I was kinda glad you were still around

Every time I heard her scream

I got a little more annoyed

Funny how that works

At first, you were the one

I couldn't stand

Guess you liked it here

There was food, you stayed dry

I wasn't gonna throw you out

That should've been enough

It should've been

Here comes the Sergeant

There goes my wife again

You haven't changed at all

You just ran across the wall

Honestly, I don't even mind

Having you around

Here comes the Sergeant

There goes my wife again

But how long can we keep this up?

You show up, she screams

You run, I get tired

So I thought about it

For a little while

The next time you showed up

I grabbed the broom

You ran across the wall

Like you always did

You were fast

But that day

I didn't let you get away!

...Don't take it personally

You did nothing wrong

And neither did I

You were just eating roaches

Living your life

I really didn't wanna kill you

Hell, I'd gotten kinda attached

You did nothing wrong

And neither did I

But every time you showed up

This whole house went insane

So what else was I supposed to do?

Life doesn't always follow logic

I stood there in the quiet

And looked at the wall

You weren't there anymore

This is better

This is better

That night

A roach showed up

My wife screamed