Lyric

I didn’t have the strength to take the world as it is

No filter, no mercy, no angle to miss

She crushed a whole field of flowers under her feet

But that pure white dress never picked up a stain, not a hint

It was too innocent, painfully clean

So I forgot it all until this morning intervened

Four A.M., dawn spreads slow and obscene

Like a nosebleed soaking into cheap tissue sheets

The sky bleeding softly, pink turning red

That quiet kind of violence inside my head

With the phantom sound of the intercom ringing

I remembered it all in one breath, no blinking

You are now

You are now

You are now

A beautiful-voiced phone operator says

“Don’t worry at all, please continue as is,” in my head

Probably smiling while she tells me it’s fine

Her voice pressed gently against my ear, inline

“It’s okay, really, keep using it, trust,”

Like systems don’t rot, like bodies don’t rust

Then my heartbeat kicks back, loud and proud

Footsteps of your happiness running through the crowd

My pulse says: this is joy knocking on you—

Wait, seriously? Is that actually true?

I didn’t have the strength to take the world as it came

She shattered the flowers but stayed untouched by their names

No color would cling to that dress in the storm

Untainted, unreal, aggressively pure in its form

Too innocent, that scene, too clean to retain

So I let it dissolve until morning came again

Four A.M., dawn spreading out wide

Like blood through a tissue, no place left to hide

Hallucinated doorbell, a sound with no source

Memory flooding back all at once, full force

You are now

You are now

You are now

Right now you exist, right now you persist

Between fear and reassurance that can’t coexist

Between automated kindness and visceral proof

Between a calm voice and a heart telling truth

The world keeps saying, “It’s safe, it’s okay,”

While my chest keeps knocking in its own way

Footsteps of happiness—or a warning somehow

Either way, it’s loud, and it’s happening now

You are now

You are now

You are now