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Gout of New Year 2026
The Ultimate New Year's Song of Laughter, Tears, and Excruciating Pain
During Japan's year-end season, a hellish combo unfolds nationwide: "Year-end parties New Year's feast New Year's parties."
Herring roe, salmon roe, cod milt, crab-an all-star lineup of purine-rich foods. Faced with this deadly array, one man makes a decision:
"If I'm going to suffer anyway, I might as well laugh through it."
Thus was born this unprecedented gout anthem for the New Year.
Starting with dark, heavy enka ballad, exploding into euphoric EDM, and culminating in an emotional grand finale-4 minutes and 46 seconds of laughter, tears, and agonizing pain.
The Story
The Temple Bell Awakening: With each toll of the bell, he counts not sins but foods: "Herring roe... salmon roe... cod roe... cod milt..." Instead of purging desires, his appetite awakens-completely counterproductive.
The Red & White Battle: While his family laughs watching the New Year's Eve song competition on TV, his ankle hosts its own Red & White battle-swollen red flesh and white bandages. Despite his doctor's voice echoing in his mind, his hand still reaches for the shrimp tempura. The excuse "just on New Year's Eve" is heartbreaking.
The 109th Temptation: After the 108 bell tolls cleanse all earthly desires, the man finds himself standing before the refrigerator. What awaited him there? "Cod milt with ponzu sauce." At this moment, all reason collapses.
The Explosion: The song explodes. Heavy enka transforms instantly into celebratory EDM. Taiko drums, brass fanfares, and champagne pops erupt as he shouts "Bring on the gout! Happy New Year!"-an unstoppable New Year's celebration begins.
New Year's Realities (Gout Edition):
First shrine visit? The orthopedic clinic
Can't reach the offering box
Fortune slip says "Bad Luck"-but uric acid "double the limit" is scarier
New Year's gift money? All goes to medical bills
New Year's dream? Being chased by cod milt
The Insane Blessing: "Congratulations on your doctor's orders to stop!" The perfect excuse: "Isn't lounging around all New Year's great? Can't walk anyway!"
The Emotional Revelation:
Because I'm alive, I feel pain
Because I can eat, I know happiness
If I can laugh even when I can't walk
Isn't that enough for life?
The Ending: The man solemnly makes his pledges. "108 tolls... desires vanished..." Just as he feels relieved-
"Wait... there's crab miso in the fridge..."
This man will never learn.
The ultimate New Year's anthem celebrating imperfection, human weakness, and the courage to laugh through pain.
Happy Gout Year!
Lyricist- composer- and music producer. Also handles vocals- graphic design- accounting- HR- and marketing- all single-handedly- of course. Currently hiding quietly in a corner of Tokyo-s chaos- secretly creating mysterious music that no one asked for and no one could ever predict. In 2025- on an otherwise ordinary day- a long-dormant musical talent suddenly exploded. There were no signs. No warnings. The cause is unknown- and the artist himself is the most confused of all. The music born from this explosion is pop- yet philosophical and mystical. Spun directly from inspiration- each track gently embraces the listener-s heart and quietly guides them toward a vision of the future. It radiates a pure- translucent aqua-blue vibration - as if the universe and Earth were resonating together. Listeners find themselves journeying from the deep blue ocean to the edge of the cosmos in an instant. But there is also another troublesome side. Out of nowhere- he creates ridiculously absurd songs-with a straight face-that shatter society-s sense of normal. People who hear them first ask- What on earth am I listening to ? Then- Why didn-t anyone stop him ? And ultimately- for some reason- Why am I suddenly tearing up ? A strange emotional impact no one can quite explain. This bizarre ability remains unsolved. Amazingly- the music doesn-t come from theory or knowledge. It is built solely on infinite inspiration (also known as escapism) and soulful intuition. Which means there-s no reproducibility-and not even the creator knows what will come next. There is another inexplicable trait: When inspiration descends- the song is finished at terrifying speed. By the time the cup noodles are ready- the entire track-from intro to outro-is already playing in his head. By the time his coffee cools- the DAW programming is done. By the time his boss finishes talking in a meeting- No. He absolutely does not produce music during meetings. Absolutely not. The secret of this abnormal speed is unknown. In fact- when he notices- the work is simply finished. His day job is that of a normal office worker (also known as a corporate drone). By day- he swims through vast seas of Excel- is tossed by the storm called customer complaints- and gets sucked into the space-time distortion known as meetings. But when night falls and he puts on his headphones- music pours out as if he-s directly connected to the infinite universe. This extreme contrast is the defining feature of AQUABLUE- and the most mischievous secret behind what makes the music so uniquely captivating. So-close your Excel files (after saving properly- of course) and dive once more into the far reaches of the cosmos tonight.