Saishu Densha de Kaeru Kinyoubi

Friday night I laughed a lot with friends at a gathering. It was supposed to be fun but the moment I got on the last train loneliness rushed over me. A couple sleeping in the seat next to me holding hands. I used to have Friday nights like that too. Riding the last train together buying ice cream at a convenience store deciding whose place to go to. That everyday life no longer exists anywhere. I get off at my station and walk home alone. The winter night wind is cold against my cheeks. As the alcohol wears off the feelings I had pushed down start to surface. I unlock my door and say I am home to the dark room. No one answers. Even though that has become normal I still cannot get used to it. The lonelier I feel after a fun night the deeper it cuts. I just want to sleep. Tomorrow will be a little better. I have to believe that.